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mandible.diary-x Aug. 22, 2004 -- 12:24 a.m. |
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mandible.diary-x A warning: FUCKING. AWFUL. MOOD. You will probably want to request a re-review in a couple of weeks. Don't take this personally. That is all. Username - You named your diary after a jawbone. That's right on the line between fucking retarded and unbelievebly awesome. I'm leaning towards awesome. First Impression - GREEN! I love green. But I'm sure you knew that by now. And it's even the right kind of green. Errors - UGH. NO. CAPITALIZATION. DEATH. 5/10 Layout - GREEEEEEEEN GREEN GREEN and a picture of a skull. Self designed. Only problem is that fucking text box. I hate those. Kill that, just make your entry out in the open. If it weren't for the textbox, you would have had a perfect score here. 17/20 Content - Since you don't have very many entries, I'll start at the beginning. By "at the beginning", I mean at the about page, and then at the beginning after that. I don't like that you don't tell us more. So far I know that you're a chick who's under 18 that enjoys gory movies and metal music, and has a lot of tattoos and piercings. Okay. An exact age would be better. A name would be nice, even if it's fake. A location would be nice. Maybe something about your family/friends/whatever. I like to know shit about people before I start reading. Amusing. Pointless. Explain. Who pissed you off there, exactly? How? This was good, but it wasn't written by you. you should have added your own thoughts and expanded upon it, you know? I have decided that the word "crush" is a really, really stupid fucking word. That entry was rather cheesy, by the by. "I have crushes on them and my heart hurts when he's away." Fucking come on. Are you aware that your titles don't make any damn sense to anyone who isn't you? No? Well now you are. You took pointless. Why have you decided you like horses since working with them? Detail, woman, detail! If emotions are so overrated, why do you seem to be enjoying them so much? Hmmm? Exactly. Shut up. Jesus fucking christ. You're not a minor obsessed with a married man... you're my best friend, but with a vagina. TOO BAD FOR YOU I TOTALLY HATE HIM RIGHT NOW. Like I said. Re-review. Why? "Blah Blah, I am a zombie, blah, show, blah feelings blah blah tatoo artist blah." And more pointlessness. In ten years, you're not going to care about how you liked bald guys when you were a kid, or how some married douche gave you his shirt. LYRICS OF DEATH. fuck I fucking hate lyrics. O_o Who fucking cares? You're talking about tortilla chips. TORTILLA CHIPS. That's got to be an all-time low or something. Laste sentence there. Yeah. Me fucking too. Eh it's okay. You'll get better with practice. Maybe make another diary for daylog and keep this one to be the wonderful piece of work. And that's all your entries. Soooo see above advice. Your journal is all daylog and boys, you're right. And you don't capitalize. I couldn't get a feel for who the fuck you are at all. All I know about you is that you're older than 16 [you can drive], you're a libra [I hate the only other libra I know], you're ga-ga over a married man and some other guy in boston [which is apparently not where you live, because if you lived there, you'd be with him]. I don't know anything at all about your personality. If you're outgoing, inverted, a bitch, nice, intelligent, retarded, fucking anything, and that pisses me off. You don't explain much. I'd be okay with it if your entries were deeper... if you made me think about shit when you updated... but you don't. I think you've got potential. Maybe. Or maybe I'm just too fucking tired to rip you a new one. Either way, get another diary, make THAT one for daylog, keep this one for deep thoughts/being artistic and vague/whatever you want to do with it. Request a re-review when you think you're on the right track. 9/65 Would I Come Back? - Blaaaaaaah. 0/5 Bonus - You remind me of my best friend [FUCKING ASSHOLE I HATE HIM I HATE HIM DIE], and I think I took points off your content for that because I'm awesome. You get plus one points because he'd want me to do so for the boots thing. Boots are awesome. +1/5 Total - 32/100. Re-review, bitches. X. 12. Also, get a guestbook or something. I hate it when I can only email or IM people because I despise email and IM. But of course, none of you saw that coming. Reviewed by Amanda | ||
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