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realypopular Sept. 12, 2004 -- 9:58 p.m. |
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| realypopular Let me just say that at first, I tried to give you the benefit of the doubt. I saw the stereotypicality of it all [poor grammar/spelling, awful layout, retarded personality] and thought to myself "Wait a minute... maybe this is a joke diary. Like troubledteen or something. But bad." For those of you who don't know, troubledteen [not linked because it's dead now] was a fake diary about a "teenaged girl". It was quite funny. So, when I saw this, I wanted so badly to believe it was another joke. I even left a note saying so. Sadly, this was not the case. This "Emma" individual seems to be for real. Which means that I will have to review it as a real diary. Username - Forgotten how to spell "really", I see. That's okay dear. Memorizing which words have double letters and which words don't can be very difficult, especially for someone as... special as you. First Impression - It's going to be a long night... Errors - You are what I would like to refer to as a "failed abortion", making you the biggest error I've come across yet. -1/10 Layout - ... 0/20 Content - With such brilliant and thought-provoking titles as "Gay marriage is for queers", I can see that soon I will be bowing down to your intellectual superiority and natural eloquence. You fucking douche. Let's think about that for a moment, "gay marriage is for queers". For the purpose of this conversation [which I have a feeling will be a little one-sided, but that is okay], we will assume that by "queers" you mean "homosexuals", and not what it actually means, because queer isn't even really a noun. Good going. Anyway, translated into proper english [as in, sans slang], your title is "gay marriage is for homosexuals". To simplify this even for you, that means "gay marriage is for gays." This raises many interesting questions, such as "who else would gay marriage be for?" and "who performed your frontal lobotomy?" Moving on. You have only fourteen entries, and I am going to have fun ripping every single one of them to tiny pieces. Ooh, this next one looks good. Your perfect day. Muahaha. Let's paraphrase for those too lazy to click the link: "6:00 AM i wake up and take my shower to wash all the football team's jizz out of my hair 7:00 AM my wonderful boyfriend drives me too school and we fuck in the parking lot. afterwards we get applauseee~~! oh wait, just kidding, i do not have a boyfriend because i am incapable of maintaining a monogomous, loving relationship with one person! tee hee! 8:00 AM i go to my honors class. notice how i said class and not classes, and i have that one class because i sucked my teacher's cock! tee hee heee! 4:00 School starts, cheer practice starts, both of them at the same time even though we already determined that school starts at eight in the morning and not four in the afternoon! looks like i'm not learning anything from taht honors class of mine after all! whoops! 6:00 I go get my hair color fixed, nails done, tan, etc. 8:00 go home and eat supper, then throw it up ten minutes later because i need to be skinny to conform to society's standards of beautiful! hee hee! 8:10 vomit up dinner 9:00 start homework 9:03 get distracted by shiny objects 10:00 watch TV, have some ~~~Emma Lee Time~~~ [note: by ~~~Emma Lee Time~~~ i mean i am MASTURBATING! hee hee!] 11:30 Go to bed... with the soccer team ahhh that is my perfect day. i bet you wish you were me know!!!" Moral of the story? I am the best. Heh heh. A member of student concil. Your parents must be so proud. Aww. How sweet. Your and your boyfriend are fucking. This is certain proof that he loves you and you two will be together for ever and ever and ever. Awww. The rest of your entries are nice and generic, so there is not much to make fun of, except your stupidity. Seriously. You take retarded to a whole new level. -5/65 Would I Come Back? - If you promise to give us more pearls of wisdom like "gay marriage is for queers". Brilliant! 0/5 Bonus - I correct myself, YOU are the stupidest person I have had the "pleasure" of running into so far. -5/5 Total - -11/100. Is there any way I could persuade you to kill yourself and stop wasting my oxygen? If you really are a joke diary and I've got you all wrong, then kudos, but you took it too far with the gay marriage bashing, and you should still kill yourself. Reviewed by Amanda | ||
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