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screamnow Aug. 15, 2004 -- 12:06 p.m. |
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| screamnow So, here's the thing. I actually started this review yesterday. Your review is what I was doing before my little brother decided that it would be intelligent to pour water ALL THE FUCK OVER THE BACK OF MY MONITOR. I don't blame you, of course, but I'm in an awful mood. How awful? Awful like My-Guinea-Pig-Is-In-The-Process-Of-Dying-And-We-Can't-Call-To-Find-Out-How-He-Is-And-My-Best-Friend-Decided-He-Hates-Me-Again-Over-This-And-My-Monitor-Is-Fucking-Dead-And-I-Can-See-A-Grand-Total-Of-16-Colors awful. So try not to take this review too personally, and you are welcome to request a re-review. You will almost more than likely want to. On to the review! Username - Scream now. I want to finish it off with "...or forever hold your peace." Hella bad ass. Aww... you give an explanation. That's lame. You know what? You should just pretend that your original intent was what I came up with. then you can look like a supergenius, and all the ladies will love you. I fucking rock. First Impression - Hearts. Too. Many. Damn. Hearts. Errors - You don't capitalize. Super upltra mega error of death! You also periodically forget how to properly use apostrophes and the difference between "your" and "you're". 1/10 Layout - I saw it before my MONITOR DIED [you are so never going to hear the end of that] and it was alright. I didn't much care for the green color you used, but hey, whatever floats your boat. Your head is at an odd angle there. I guess you were posing. I hate that. You're not a camwhore, I don't think, so there's no need to take pictures like you are. Just look at the camera like a good little girl and let us actually see your face. Layout issss self designed, I think. 16/20 Content - Started here. Lovely. You're a cutter. That sooo makes me want to read the rest of this diary. -massive eyeroll- And it's spelled memorize, babe. What's up with this trend of reffering to boys as boy face or boy doll? Boy face doesn't make any damn sense. Boy doll.. well... kinds does, because it's like boy toy. But the way you write about him, you're really his toy... so just cut that shit out. I also hate it when people reffer to someone as just "boy". It reeks fucking white trash. Center that heart and arrows down at the bottom. It's bothering me. I like everything to be all nice and neat and uniform. I don't see why it's off to the left. So just make it center, okay? Little known fact [apparently]: ellipses have three dots. Not two. Not four. THREE. I know you're being rebellious and stylistic and trying to find yourself and blahdey blahdey blah, but try not to make yourself look retarded in the process. this can be acheived by staying within the limits of proper grammar. So just go that extra step, press the fucking button one more time. You'll be glad you did. Awww, how cute, you're insecure, and changing yourself for a fucking BOY! YAY! That's fucking brilliance right there. Poetry! She writes poetry! This just gets better and better, doesn't it? At first iwas cute how you always reffered to him as darling or dear or boyface, but now it's getting repetitive and annoying. Maybe 'cause you do it with everybody you reffer to in your diary. Anyway, stop it. Find a different way to reffer to people. You're vague and depressing, and for someone who says so little, rediculously repetitive. Work on that. Also work on not changing yourself for other people, and just learning to be yourself. I've noticed that a lot of chicks [all of them with diaries, ironically] become unbelievebly obsessed with guys. Okay, not guys, but one guy in particular. I am not exempt from this, but I like to think that I maintain a life in addition to this preoccupation. I don't get the same impression from everyone else. I get the feeling that you chicks are like girls at school that I know, like the one that you're not really close to but she feels the need to tell you everything going on ith her love life anyway. This shouldn't be surprising, but I don't like those girls. I want to put them through a window. I probably could, too, since they're all so busy starving themselves and only weigh like ninety pounds when wet. YAY! Where was I going with this? Right, right, you suck, grow a backbone. Actually, I'm going to allow hate mail on your part because I'm being a real bitch here, and because I think it would be good for you to assert yourself. 24/65 Would I Come Back? - Actually, I might. If I ignore the redundancy, the stereotypical teenage depression/angst, the lack of respect for grammar and spelling, the overabundance of "&", and the bizarre face tilt, it wasn't so bad. You say interesting things every so often. 2/5 Bonus - My once best friend would probably think you're cute. He'd also totally kill me if I didn't give you at least one bonus point for that, since I think you're kinda cute too. Just... take another picture without such a weird head angle. +1/5 Total - 44/100. Stay in school. Say no to drugs. Fix your grammar, your depression, and your preoccupation with "boy", then request a re-review. Reviewed by Amanda | ||
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