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the-story-of Sept. 10, 2004 -- 7:01 p.m. |
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| the-story-of So, here's the thing. I already fucking reviewed you. Two nights ago. But my computer is a dirty bitch that needs to be shot in the face, and decided to delete it. All of it. Maybe if I had enjoyed reading your diary the first time, this wouldn't be so bad, but alas, your diary sucks cock. You got a 2 out of 100. Yes, a two. With that said, this review isn't going to be as detailed or as funny as it was the first time. And, also, your score will be much lower than a two [I'm SO not against giving out negative scores, in case you haven't noticed] because you changed your layout. You fucking cunt. Username - Maybe I'd like it if it didn't sound like damn near every other screenname out there. First Impression - Oh look. White. And a picture. Of your ex. You know, the one you were in love with. After dating for THREE WEEKS. [Told you I'd read it already.] Errors - You are an error. You spell "guitarist" wrong on your fucking INTERESTS section. Awesome. Also, you're thirteen. Thirteen year olds should be permanently banned from the internet. I know, I know, that's an awful thing to say and I was thirteen once too, but I was stupid at thirteen. More intelligent than you, but still stupid, and I should have stayed away from the internet. 0/10 Layout - That dude? Yeah, he looks like a chick. Not just any chick, either... like one of those blow-up sex dolls made of plastic. You have awesome taste in men. -snicker- 0/20 Content - Starting here. "Apsent"? Absent. ABSENT. IT IS NOT A DIFFICULT WORD TO SPELL. Did I mention that you got a two out of one hundred the first time through? Yes? Just making sure. I hate your design set-up. See, the DESIGN link to the right there is supposed to link to the place where you got the code. If that is not possible, you place a link to the code on the page about your designs. Which you haven't done. You douche. P.S. - No one cares about your designs but you. You don't need a seperate fucking page dedicated to them. Credit for the code of this design [but not the design itself because that sucks] to Angry Rectangle. And that is how it is done. Awww, how cute, you like Good Charlotte and Avril Lavigne and such. NO. WRONG. KILL YOURSELF KILL YOURSELF NOW. Disgusting, awful sellout music. Heh heh, you respond to reviews. Now, I'm mean enough as it is with reviews. You guys know that. But when I realize that a person will probably get really bent out of shape about their review and whine and bitch at me later, I get Super Ultra Mega Mean, because I ADORE starting shit. Really. Most of the time, I think it's hilarious. MOVING ON. Proberbly, ah, yes, proberbly. I remember hating that so very very much while reading through the first time and, not surprisingly, nothing has changed. Hahahahaha, I love the way you deny who you are when replying to them. That was pure brilliance right there, acting like you don't really like GC and Avril fucking Lavigne. Heh heh. Yeah, this? Funny as fuck, though I know for a fact you didn't mean it to be. If I remember correctly though, there's a funnier one coming up later where you go so far as to say you want to kill yourself over this boy you dated for three weeks. Oh, right, the P-O-Y submissions. I fucking hated those. There were no less than eight hundred of them and I skimmed each and every single one of them because they suck. We have electric! I like the way you just sort of forgot the last three letters in electricity. You're definitly not the brightest crayon in the box. Pointless. Extras suck, especially sucky extras like that one. Suck. Yeah, the way you write pisses me off. Just the style. You have this awful habit of NEVER USING COMMAS EVER, you just break everything up into tiny three worded sentences. Now, I don't like run-on sentences, but what you are doing is called "overkill". Example: Like. Oh my god. I am. So sad. Evan broke up. With me. I am crying. I like Avril. Lavigne. She is deep. And understands me. Ahhh you get the idea. Stop that. I'd correct your spelling errors, but I think my head would explode, so for now I am trying to ignore them. Oooh, that's right, the bullshit pyromaniac comment. Fuck, I bet you didn't even know what pyro was short for. Listen, you are not a pyromaniac. You are a cookie-cutter "alternative" girl and part of said cookie-cutter alternative image is liking fire. So, you like fire, and you call yourself a pyro. NO. WRONG. GAME OVER YOU LOSE. You are NOT a pyromaniac until you have serious problems with setting shit on fire. Which you DON'T. So shut up. YES! YEEEEES! The overdose entry! Awww man, that shit had me rolling on the floor laughing. I kid you not. By the by, putting pictures of your ex boyfriend on your layout is probably not the best way to get over him. Just a thought. Retard. Good god did you ever end up with the wrong reviewer for this job. You talk about fucking heavy petting in great detail. At thirteen. THIRTEEN. Now, I'm not calling you a slut, but the temptation is certainly there. OMIGAWD! WALMART, HOW TRENDY, GAWd, LOL!!! Just... stop talking. Permanently. HA! OH GOD, THE IRONY! THE IRONY!! "I'm not mean. I HATE THEM ALL." ... BAHAHAHAHAHAHA ... Jesus fuck, your boyfriend is sixteen? I just lost the small amount of respect I had for you, sorry babe. Yeah. I hate you. But really, you should have seen that coming. You get one point for capitalizing. Most of the time, anyway. 1/65 Would I Come Back? - Proberbly not. See what I did there? 0/5 Bonus - No comment. 0/5 Total - 1/100. Awesome. I managed to cut your score in half. GO ME. Bring on the angry diary entries! Reviewed by Amanda | ||
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